A Night to Remember...

Jewelry? Check! 

Shoes? Check!

Dress? Check!

As I readied myself for the WCSG Father/Daughter Banquet, I couldn't help but wonder how "ma girls" were doing.  Last year, I had the pleasure of attending this Daddy/Daughter date night with my dad. Few months after the banquet, some UFM teens were talking to Mr. Dan, a faithful volunteer staff member, about the event, commenting on how they wish he would take them to the banquet in 2013.  Dan approached me shortly after his conversation with the girls asking if I'd be willing to help make this happen. 

 On Friday, April 12th, Dan escorted Mikela, Miracle, and Sarah. Luke, another volunteer, escorted Jaira and Ashari, and my dad, Dave, escorted Deshownna and me to the WSCG Father/Daughter Banquet. Each of us has a different "father" story, but this evening we were escorted by three incredible men who simply wanted to treat us all like princesses.

We rode to Hudsonville in a UFM 15 passenger van, and sashayed into the Pinnacle Conference Center in Hudsonville.  Ok, so we're not the "sashay" types, so some ran, some wobbled in on stylish heels, and the men walked coolly to the door.

The girls were all dressed to the nines in pretty dresses, cute shoes, and accessories to match. The men looked dapper and Mr. Dan wore a fancy new suit!  We met at the UFM office to snap some photos and hop in our "sweet ride."  The girls were all a flutter with anticipation.  After arriving at the event site, we found our table, got comfy and stared around the room. What fun it was to see all the dads and their daughters enjoying time with each other.  Not a frown to be seen.  

Dinner was served. A fancy dinner.  We had multiple forks and cloth napkins.  The girls were so precious as they navigated their way through this high-class affair.  We ate our salads and rolls, and waited for the main course.  The presentation was lovely, Hawaiian chicken, green beans, and mashed potatoes smothered in a Hawaiian pineapple sauce.  We dug in…but, hungry as we were, for some around the table, the fancy food did not meet their expectations, so they ate cake and rolls and salad all the while making hilarious, disgusted faces as the rest of us finished our meals.

Jason Castro, American Idol season seven fourth runner up, was the entertainment for the evening. The girls talked through much of the concert, commenting on his musical style, other people's outfits, the decorations, the food, etc.  The little girls, ages 10 and 11, tried hard to stay engaged, but the music just wasn't their style.  At one break when Jason was introducing his next song, we heard noises that sounded like radio interference. My dad and I looked down and saw that Jaira and Ashari were laying underneath a chair watching Spongebob Squarepants on someone's cell phone.

At evening's end, the emcees announced that all ladies would receive a flower as they left.  All of the girls were excited. After snapping a few more photos, we made our way to the door.  As the girls  received a carnation from the Cornerstone Radio staff, their faces lit up. Some had never received a flower before so they felt extra special.

As we rode home, the girls chattered about the event, school, friends, and the homework they had to complete over the course of the weekend.  As we left, lots of hugs were exchanged and many "thank-yous" expressed. 

What an incredible experience the evening was!  I am so thankful to be surrounded by incredible students, volunteers, and family and am so very grateful to have shared such a memorable night with such great friends.  

~guest author, Heidi, staff

Call me, Maybe?

There are a select few kids/teens who have my cell phone number.  I do this because I prefer not to be inundated with phone calls on Saturdays (regarding Super Saturday), or any other day of the week for that matter. 

The past week, I've received a few phone calls from one of our teenagers, Keyon, who just called to tell me about his day, and it has been lovely.   

I've known Keyon for a while, and used to think he didn't like me very much.  He can be quite the story teller. Once I “got wise” to his habit of embellishment, I called him out. I learned it was necessary to be very direct with him, and he didn’t always appreciate my honesty. For this reason, he would avoid telling me things and would often respond to my questions with silence.

Keyon

Through all of this, I think I gained his respect. He realized he couldn't put up a front with me as he had a tendency of doing.   Now, we have good conversations on a regular basis. Rather than constantly being frustrated with the choices that he is making, I see him growing into a solid young man.

About a month ago, while we were talking about my birthday, the following conversation occurred:

Keyon: Miss Melissa.  I want to get you something for your birthday? What do you want for your birthday?

Me: You don't need to get me anything

Keyon: But I want to, what do you want?

Me: I don't know, something you think I'd like

Keyon: A dress?

Me: What? Do you know me at all?

Keyon: [uproarious laughter]

I love that he knows me. (I’m not much of a “dress person.”)  Even with our limited interactions and my perception that I wasn't his favorite person we’ve grown to understand each other on some level.

It's been fun watching him grow from early “teenager-hood” to now.  I've seen him mature quite a lot, and look forward to picking up him and his brothers for Super Saturday.  Usually, each of them has a story for me when they get in the van, and it's fun to hear what they’ve experienced throughout the week and what they are looking forward to.

Keyon has taught me so much about being open and fully present with our kids.  In the past, I may have dismissed his phone calls or stories just because I was tired or busy.  Now I love that he calls, and all that it means when he does.

~guest author, Melissa K, volunteer

A highlight of just one of our awesome teens...

Shamar (L) and Trevon (R) at Teen Leadership camp.

"I'm so happy Miss Katie had me sit next to Christopher that one time" Trevon said out of the blue on our drive home one night.

Trevon is a teenager who is on my Super Saturday van route, and part of UFM's teen leadership group.  Christopher is in elementary school and he used to have a huge problem focusing and being respectful during Super Saturday.  One week, Miss Katie (who had Christopher on her pickup route and got to know him pretty well) asked Trevon to sit with Christopher during the lesson so that he could help him pay attention.

I wasn't there when she asked him, but knowing Trevon he did it willingly.  He's got a great attitude, and is incredibly helpful.  This is one of the things I love about our teens: they are so willing to help.  They come with such an eager spirit, and it really shows what Super Saturday means to them.

He told me later that he feels like he can help Chris because he used to be kind of restless like him.  Trevon found it amazing how much they could connect, and how he can stay patient with him because he knows how he feels.

Trevon beams when he talks about Christopher.  They find each other immediately at Super Saturday, and now they are on the same van so have even more time to hang out.  I've also seen a huge shift in Christopher.  He respects Trevon and knows he can ask him questions rather than seek attention elsewhere.

This is just one example of the amazing teens involved at UFM.  It has been wonderful to see them grow up (literally).  I've known some of them for 5+ years and it's really incredible to see the change.  In a time where some rebel, fall into the wrong crowd, or start making bad decisions, this group has made a different choice.  They're still learning, but aren't we all?

I'm so thankful that UFM has a place for these teens, and I'm thankful that they are investing as well.  They're investing in themselves, they're investing in an organization that they belong to, and they're investing in the next generation of kids.

"I just love Chris,” Trevon often says.  It makes me happy every time.

~guest author, Melissa K, volunteer

God is always speaking... we rarely listen...

     While prepping for small group, I spent nearly 4 hours in search of a Psalm that would help us continue on the trajectory of “Remembering: A Journey through Story.” God and I had words. It seemed He was keeping me stuck on a particular passage that didn’t seem applicable. I wasn’t listening. He HAD given me the words to share, but I wasn’t cooperating.

The teen girls group.

     Thursday evening, as we began our discussion, I told the girls, “It seems God just wants us to share with one another.” We reflected on how long we’ve been in community and the safety of sharing life with sisters who care. (The week prior we’d talked about the real meanings of love as found in 1 Corinthians 13). I was able to share what God laid on my heart and proceeded to open the floor to anything they felt they wanted to share.

     Conversation flowed quite naturally as the girls talked about different ideas and issues they’d been thinking about. Out of the blue, Deshownna interrupted saying, “What I want to know is has anyone ever looked at Psalm 13? 12 is my favorite number so I decided to check out Psalm 12, but THEN I read Psalm 13…Psalm 13 is like, EXACTLY what I was thinking! God does that with me, like, I’ll have a question in my head and He’ll just GIVE me the answer from a person, from the Bible for somewhere else.”

     God is always talking, we just need to slow down and listen.  He gives us exactly the words we need, exactly when needed. Deshownna’s testimony is powerful. That young lady listens. She’s always sharing new things God has whispered to her, thereby encouraging all around her to slow down and listen up.

 “But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, for he has been good to me.”  Psalm 13:5-6

~ guest author - Heidi, staff

Superbowl Sunday... connecting Urban and Suburban

UFM and Georgetown Bible paired up to host a fabulous Superbowl Extravaganza. 

Samantha and Deshowne celebrating with their new iPods.

Glen Wilson, youth pastor at Georgetown Bible, collaborated with UFM and Tabernacle Community Church youth group to throw a hype party at UFM’s office on the corner of Eastern and Baxter.  The game was broadcast on 4 different televisions and a large projector screen. Middle and high school students and volunteers filled the rec center with laughter and conversation. Over 60 people joined in cheering on different students as they participated in a variety of “minute-to-win-it” games. Winners went home with a variety of prizes from candy bars, buckets of gumballs, all the way to $25 to iTunes or Best Buy, and two lucky winners took home iPods! 

It was a great blessing to see this facility used so well, packed with students and volunteers having a blast, sharing in community, and creating memories.  We ate, we danced, we cheered!! It was a Superbowl Party to remember.

Executive Director, Alf Clark responded to the night with these words: 

And the game gets serious....

Minute-to-win-it game

“I had a dream right after starting here in March of 2012.  I dreamed at some point, we could be part of bridging the urban community with the suburban community.  My dream included urban and suburban youth filling the main room in our office building, breaking out of their cultural shells and experiencing what Heaven will look like.  This dream, in which we as a staff continue to cultivate, is called in the office “God with US” (Urban Suburban).  This dream became a reality for the first time on Sunday night as Georgetown Bible Church, Tabernacle Community Church youth group and UFM high and middle school students merged together to watch the Superbowl game.  We had door prizes, pizza, games, pool table, foosball table, Superbowl game playing on 4 flat screen T.V’s and music bouncing in the building.  

As I sat there and looked around, it was hard to not allow a smile to break across my face.  I saw teens from the suburban area breaking bread with an urban teen.  I saw an urban teen engage in a conversation with a youth group member from a suburban setting.  As I thought through the evening of what God was doing right there in that room, he reminded me of how one of our teen boys, Dearis, arrived and immediately broke down barriers.  A group of suburban teens were sitting in the cafe’ getting ready to play cards.   They were sitting around a small round table which created more of a “huddle” look where the group is shoulder to shoulder facing each other.  This was not intentional by any means.  Dearis, walked into the cafe’ and right up to the group, placed his chin almost on the shoulders of two people sitting at the table peering into the circle.  He looked right, then left and asked “What are you guys doing?”  Someone from the group spoke up saying “We’re getting ready to play cards.”  Dearis not skipping a beat questioned, “Can I join you?”  The response was a welcoming yes and as the two people who he was peering over the shoulder of separated, he pulled up another chair and began playing.  For the rest of the night, Dearis and that group of young men and women were connected, talking and the barriers were non-existent.  

What an awesome experience watching again God, first hand, break down barriers we all know can be there, but rarely speak of.” 

Out of my comfort zone...

     Five years ago, Urban Family Ministries contacted me about tutoring a 15 year old African boy in reading. He'd been in the United States for 3 years, though couldn't read.  Foday had never gone to school in Africa and he had some anger issues, plus he struggled with our English language.  Having been a teacher of early elementary children in a suburban school district and being a 59 year old woman, I was pretty sure this wasn't going to work.  How in the world could he even relate to me, let alone understand and learn?  I took a couple of days to pray about this request.  
     What a glorious God we have - He gently led me right out of my comfort zone and into one of the most cherished relationships!  Foday and I still tutor/mentor today.  He has so many people who care about him.  We call ourselves 'Team Foday'.  Because of his perseverance, caring ways and Godly heart, his new found Christianity has influenced others in his originally Muslim family.  Often I didn't know where Foday was headed, but I always trusted the Lord had great plans for him.  

     And here he is today, with a high school diploma and a 40 hour a week job!!  His journey has not been a smooth one and we're sure there will be many more obstacles in his path ahead, BUT Jesus is not only walking along side of him, He's inside Foday!  Foday knows God asks him to bring his worries and sorrows, his thankfulness and praise to Him.

     One of Foday's favorite bible passages is Proverbs 3:5,6 "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."

"We walk by faith, not by sight."

~ guest author, Jane, volunteer

Life before and after UFM...

Miracle was asked to speak with Alf Clark, Executive Director of Urban Family Ministries this fall at a local church to share what UFM is about. Miracle is a senior at a local urban christian school, is a leader in the Teen Leadership group at UFM and is currently working on applications for colleges. She was asked to speak to what life was like before UFM and after UFM. Here is what she wrote... 

Before UFM, my life was like a rope. Everything was tied into a knot. I was the only girl of four boys and I had a big bag of confusion hanging on my shoulder. I was confused about why I always had to take care of my brothers. Rather that's cooking dinner, cleaning the house which I hated so much or helping them with their homework. Of course, I didn't have time for devotions because I really didn't know God, I mean, I knew God existed but I didn't know why I needed Him.

My life started to brighten when my mom told me about UFM. She told me that UFM is a mini-Bible study for kids in he urban community. I knew nothing about it until my brothers asked me to come to Super Saturday at Calvary Church. I had lots of fun on that day and met lots of people. I was a little afraid when I met Ms. Noelle. She looked mean and had a facial expression of a villain. Noelle has been working for UFM for at least 15 years and is still pulling through every single Saturday. In that moment, I did not know she would soon be my guardian. Another rock dropped in my bag of confusion when my mom told me she was moving to Ohio.

  I really didn't want to move because Noelle put me into a really good school. It was a christian school of 150 kids. I really didn't want to leave because I loved the school so much. So my mom called Noelle and asked if I could stay there so I could say in school. She graciously said YES! My life changed after that point. Noelle is someone who helped me to be who I am today. She brought me into her home as one of her daughters. She has made me into who I am today by teaching me leadership skills that I can use in my daily life, when I'm older or even now. Someone else who has led me to where I am now is Alf Clark. He has been such a father figure to me whether it being my Bible teacher in school or my basketball coach on the court. He has showed to never be afraid to go on and pursue my dreams as a leader.

Now that I'm surrounded with UFM, my christian life has changed. I go to church every Sunday. I'm a discipleship leader at school and I pray - for real. I pray out loud every single morning during school chapel. I love talking to God. He has blessed me with new christian friends, family and especially UFM. These two people have helped me to become who I am today. I can see UFM growing every day without a doubt. it's so surprising how it has changed over the past few months with staff or even the kids of UFM. UFM has so many great volunteers, staff and other supports to help impact kids just like me become who they really are.

~ guest author Miracle, high school senior